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PostPosted: Sat Feb 16, 2013 10:49 am 
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Somehow Pope Jim found out about my extreme dislike for Reba, and is only defectling since he's called her a babe for years.

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PostPosted: Sat Feb 16, 2013 3:47 pm 
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calvin2hikers has trouble understanding things sometimes so he reads Pictures for Big Words to get5 up to speed... :smoke:


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PostPosted: Sat Feb 16, 2013 4:06 pm 
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Plook would like to remember the night he spent with Divine, but he can't and the videotape went missing.

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PostPosted: Sat Feb 16, 2013 6:49 pm 
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Calvin is seeking funding to restore a videotape of a cross-dressing feces-fresser. $100 gets you the raw footage, a nifty propeller beanie and a license to distribute (the beanie, that is; talk to Cal's lawyers). Watch as the unnamed cult heroine, whose acting talents are abysmally divine, cleans up after Gary the Blunder Dog in what was once Plook's triple top secret basement.


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PostPosted: Sun Feb 17, 2013 6:46 am 
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Since Pope Jim is already the next Pope, the smoke you see coming from the chimneys will be after one helluva party.

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PostPosted: Sun Feb 17, 2013 8:03 am 
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calvin2hikers is starting a website to get out the Pope vote... :smoke:


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PostPosted: Sun Feb 17, 2013 8:18 am 
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In opposition to Plook's "Let's get an Anti-Christ in there" website.

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PostPosted: Sun Feb 17, 2013 10:04 am 
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Calvin is pleased to announce that Beaver Stampede will go on with guests as previously scheduled. Adele has come to her senses. She gets an extra $100 and six big bags of Doritos in all different flavors, plus assurances that condoms will be worn, even in rehearsals. (That makes sponsors Ed and Mabel happy, as all condoms will be purchased from them.) Reba has agreed to appear the following week, but only if Plook or coevad (or both?) will team up with her.


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PostPosted: Sun Feb 17, 2013 11:04 am 
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Pope Jim has a whole van load of 99cent store condoms. Coincidence? I think not!


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PostPosted: Sun Feb 17, 2013 4:48 pm 
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coevad had a relative die when they were soaking their dentures and got their head stuck in the glass.

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PostPosted: Sun Feb 17, 2013 6:43 pm 
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Calvin believes that if he always wears a condom, he'll never get sick.


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PostPosted: Sun Feb 17, 2013 8:00 pm 
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Pope Jim as usual wants all sperm accounted for... :smoke:


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 18, 2013 12:24 pm 
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Good news! Plook has agreed to appear on Beaver Stampede next week. Reba's ecstatic! She's getting her boobs lifted special for the occasion. She's even looking into that Lifestyle Lift that Debbie Boone lights up your life with at three o'clock in the morning every morning. (Plook, you lucky mammal.) And don't miss tonight's show, right after Nightline. Adele's gonna show Calvin how she hits those high notes. Viewer advisory: Wear your earmuffs.


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 18, 2013 2:42 pm 
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Pope Jim is the first pontiff to wear chaps, boots, spurs, and carry a lariet... :smoke:


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 18, 2013 3:03 pm 
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Plook wore a pink tutu and roller skates to the last gay disco bar he frequented back in 1985.


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 18, 2013 4:13 pm 
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coevad didn't feel like going outside, so he epoxied his hand to the fridge.

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PostPosted: Tue Feb 19, 2013 6:21 am 
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Calvin still can't figure out why it hurts so much when he pees!

--Bat :mrgreen:

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PostPosted: Tue Feb 19, 2013 7:09 am 
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batchain could give a shit, but that would make him too happy!

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PostPosted: Tue Feb 19, 2013 8:01 am 
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calvin2hikers just bought a meteor fragment on ebay for 99.99 RUB

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Je suis désolé pour les roles que j'ai joué dans toutes ces videos, ce n'est pas tres valorisant pour l'humanité mais si cela peu avoir fait progresser la science, alors il y aura eu un coté positif.


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PostPosted: Tue Feb 19, 2013 8:03 am 
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calvin2hikers does armchair analysis in his spare time... :smoke:


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PostPosted: Tue Feb 19, 2013 8:58 am 
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The pressure is on. Plook watched Beaver Stampede last night and he's pretty sure he can't come close to Calvin's performance with Adele, which was, in a word, masterful. Poor Plook. He's getting cold feet. Reba's tweeting him up the yin-yang, too. That woman wants to do more in her allotted ten minutes than any man could hope to do in a day, plus she wants to warble one of her hokey hits. If he hadn't already spent the advance, Plook would be on the next Carnival cruise to Patagonia. coevad's bit with Beyonce was photoshopped and lip-synched. He should be ashamed. If Beyonce came within a thousand miles of Nebraska in the last month, this reporter will eat Janet Reno. For shame, Dave. Next time put on your Priscilla Pointer costume and do it with Cal's donkey. All in all, though, a damn good show. I give it four Boehners (out of a possible five). Can't wait for next week's show. Hope Plook gets a pair.


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PostPosted: Tue Feb 19, 2013 2:09 pm 
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Pope Jim obviusly found a fresh crop of wild mushrooms growing on the grounds of the Papal Palace... :smoke:


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PostPosted: Tue Feb 19, 2013 4:32 pm 
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Plook is thinking of reviving Rally Round The Flag and touring it in certain Latvian countries.

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PostPosted: Tue Feb 19, 2013 8:09 pm 
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calvin2hikers feels like becoming a Canadian... :smoke:


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PostPosted: Tue Feb 19, 2013 8:11 pm 
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Calvin has footage of coevad and Adele that he's saving for the blooper reel...or possibly civil court.

Aw shit, Plook slipped one in on me. Plook has zits on his tits and Funyuns up his bunions.


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